We recently had the conversation with our boys on the having separate bedrooms.
Our third bedroom had always been an office/home school room. In early October we rented it out for the month to a friend of the family who was fresh out of rehab and needing a cheap place to stay that wasn't with his old drug-abusing friends.
When he moved in, we did what we'd been talking about doing for years, and that was to bring the office out into our breakfast "nook". Since our home school has always been done in the dinning room and at the bar in the kitchen, the move was easy.
So what to do with the new room?
The boys asked if they could have their own. Justin would move out and leave V with the ability to keep a clean room with messy brother gone.
We said no. I admit part of me wanted to say yes- after all it would be easier to have them in two separate spaces for quiet time, for cleaning purposes and for when friends come over.
But, we said no.
They're brothers, they're best friends.
At night after we've tucked them in sometimes I go back to ease drop. I can't think of a time that brings me more internal smiles than when I listen in on my boys laughing and giggling as they lay in bed, in the dark.
They share their ups and downs, they talk about their dreams, their friends. They laugh. Did I mention that? I love to hear my boys laugh. The giggle. Not too often do 11 and 13 year old boys giggle, but they do - together.
When we told them no on the separate bedrooms they didn't bat an eye, they didn't complain or argue; this could be because they've asked before and we explained before the brotherhood that they share.
This is your only brother here on earth. Your friends may come and go but in the end you're brothers for life. You may not always like one another but there is nothing you can do, God chose you two to be earthly brothers and that's that.
Enjoy the late nights in your room.
The scheming and planning.
After all their best layed birthday surprises and homemade cards have come out of late night conversations and "crafting" times.
Often when I'm at my whits ends with school and housework, I'll wake up to 2 sleepy boys who stayed up late to clean their room or do school work ahead of time, or make mom a card; and all because they share a bedroom.
So that's why we have said not o separate bedrooms and yes to the comradely of brotherhood.